Ep #166: 8 Things I Learned in 10 Years

You are listening to episode 166 of The Confident Coaches Podcast, the one where you’re gonna learn in one episode what I learned in 10 years. Let’s go.

Welcome to the Confident Coaches Podcast, a place for creating the self-confidence you need to do your best work as a life coach. If you want to bring more boldness, more resilience, and more joy to your work, this is the place for you. I’m. Amy Latta, let’s dive in.

Hello coaches. How are you guys doing today? I hope you’re doing fabulous. So, you are listening to this the second week of 2023, but I’m actually recording this a week ago from when you’re listening. And so, this is my first episode of the year and I’m recording this on what I am realizing is the 10th anniversary of starting my coaching business.

What? How is that even possible? I don’t even know how it’s possible. So, the episode I’m going to bring to you today is 8 things that I kind of wish I knew before I got started. Definitely wish I knew before I scaled to being a six-figure and beyond coach and for sure lessons that I’ve learned in my 10 years.

And some of this I’ve already shared on social media, but I’m going to get into each one just a little bit more than what I’ve shared so far. Plus, you know, by the end of this episode, you know me, I’ll end up speaking off the cuff and throwing some extra stuff in there.

When I really think about 10 years in the coaching industry, what even I have seen some things, my friends, and I’m going to throw in a couple other things, because there’s 8 things that I’ve come up with, 8 things that I’ve learned as a coach in 10 years.

But for sure we’re going to have some bonus ones in there. So, it’ll probably end up being like 17 or 22. Who knows? This one right off the top, a lot of you don’t know this, but I have not always been a business coach and a lot of people will say that you can only make money if you are selling coaching to other coaches, and that’s simply not the case.

I started out as a weight coach and then I moved into confidence coaching and then I moved into confidence coaching for coaches and ultimately becoming a feminist business coach. And the year that I first made six-figures, I was still coaching both weight loss and confidence and not just to coaches.

And I think that’s super important because in 10 years of coaching, it is important to know that I didn’t just wake up one day, decide to start selling, how to sell coaching to coaches and you should buy from me because I did it one time.

I’ve been around. First of all, I have a business degree. My degree is in marketing. So back in 1992. Yes guys, I’m that old. When I graduated from high school, when I went to college, I was a business major, and this is what I was learning. And that’s the degree I graduated with in 96.

And then I had a 10-year, from 96 to 2006, a 10-year corporate marketing career where I learned sales practices, copywriting, copy that motivates people to buy, how to structure a marketing plan, how to structure a launch, how to launch a new product or program.

These were all things I had before I ever entered life coaching. And then 10 years ago, I technically became a coach. Now it wasn’t necessarily life coaching at the time. I was a weight loss coach through a direct sales company. And you know, direct sales is very different than corporate marketing. Those were two very different animals.  

I was frequently coached and taught to forget what I knew about marketing and sales from the corporate and to embrace the more direct sales method. And then when I did get into life coaching, I discovered my weight loss coaching business in 2013, and then I discovered life coaching.

Like really understanding that life coaching was a thing. Thoughts and feelings come before actions and results. I discovered that content in 2015, and then I actually got certified in 2016 and now we are here, we are in 2023. So, I have that background of how the basics of business work, how you do launches and that balance, and I know I’ve talked about quite a bit of this in the past couple of episodes, that balance between the freedom that online marketing brings, but also not getting into some of those more skeevy territories and really pressure latent tactics that would not hold muster in any way shape or form in traditional marketing circles that both of these things are super important.

And when I started 10 years ago, that is something that I wish that I had known is that there wasn’t one tactic that was better than another. If there is one thing that I would say that I love about the direct sales experience that I had, is that it introduced me to mindset principles.

Not so much your thoughts, drive your feelings, drive your actions, but this idea of personal development was a huge part of the company that I had joined, and that is the doorway in which I found life coaching. So, it is kind of funny that here I am telling you right outta the gate that my thinking has come full circle.

I wish I knew what I’d always known, which is there is not one way to do things and that I entered life coaching 10 years ago, or coaching 10 years ago, basically thinking, forget everything you ever knew about business and marketing and we’re going to do this direct sales model instead.

And a lot of the life coaching circles build coaching and sales not that far off from the direct sales model. And actually, we can learn a lot from that, those industries. But traditional business, traditional marketing still has a huge role to play, and in some of my earliest business coaches, and I do wish I would have looked for a coach that had that more knowledgeable marketing understanding and their success … their success as a coach wasn’t just based on, “I’ve sold a lot and I’m going to teach you to sell a lot,” but actually understanding some of those really solid business and marketing practices and standards that are so important to incorporate into the freedom that online business really does.

So that’s kind of a segue from what we’ve been talking about in the past couple episodes, to the 8 things I really want to touch on today, and I’m going to have a little bit of fun with this episode, okay? It’s already starting.

So, you know, I started as a weight loss coach, direct sales company, inviting people to do 24-day challenges with me, and having been told to throw out everything you’ve ever learned about sales and marketing, even if this is what you used to do for a living, and it is what you have a corporate degree in. Throw all that out.

Here’s what I’ve learned in the past 10 years: for sure give other people credit for your success.

You see the fun I’m already going to have for sure. You have no bearing over whether or not you have had any success. You have little control over your clients’, little control over your revenue for sure. If you have worked your butt off and you’ve applied all of the coaching that we do and it takes some time for it to start working, and then it suddenly starts working like the flip is switched.

That was a flute for sure. You should give all of your coach credit to the work that you did because you wouldn’t want to be able to say, “how did I create this? What did I do that created this? What were the mindset shifts I had to really lean into and create this result? What were the actions that I took? What did I have to do differently? What did I have to leave behind? What were things that I kept insisting that I needed to do that when I finally let go of, I finally created success?” Yeah, you definitely don’t want to answer those questions.

Alright, the second thing: you should for sure copy what everyone else is doing, for sure.

Here’s the funny thing. This is totally a direct sales thing. Copy what I do, and it will work for you and a lot of the business coaches out there are selling this kind of coaching. Just copy exactly what I do, and it will work for you. I mean, if only that was true, right?

The interesting thing about this is that we find out I’m going to have a hard time playing the devil’s advocate on this one doing the fake ones, where really the real ones are in the explanation.

I’m already throwing up my model for this podcast episode. Do whatever the hell you want and change your plan even if you’re midway through the recording of a podcast. It doesn’t matter, like copying what everybody else is doing. This is for sure something that like they teach you from the very beginning in direct sales.

You see a lot of this in a lot of life coaching business circles. And the thing is, that if it’s working for them, it’ll work for you too. I mean, maybe. Sometimes it does and a lot of times it doesn’t, and it wouldn’t be terrible for you to think, “oh, I must be the one who sucks. I must really suck because they said, just do what I do, and it’ll work for you too.”

Hmm. I mean, maybe, or maybe following somebody else’s framework. Learning different frameworks and leaning into what really lights you on fire. What are you really good at? What are you not very good at? And deciding I’m not going to do that part. And if you find yourself in a program that’s like, if you don’t do it exactly the way that I do it, you shouldn’t be in this room then get out of that room.

Get yourself into a room that’s like, “okay, here are frameworks that work. Here’s what I know works. How can we modify this so that it works for you? I mean, maybe. Maybe that’s what you should do.

Alright, number 3: You should for sure wait until something’s perfect before you put it out there.

Like this podcast episode! Like for sure you shouldn’t throw conjectures that are side conversations to your main point. Wait until something’s absolutely perfect before you put it out there. No one wants to see you learn from your mistakes. No one wants to know that you’re growing in your knowledge and in what you know. That’s just weird.

Or, maybe that’s what your schoolteacher taught you, or that’s what your high school language teacher taught you, is that everything has to be perfect the first time around, but I don’t know.

I know that a lot more people love listening to me and following me because I am so honest about the shit that does not work all of the time in my business that there is not some magical place where perfection is achieved. It’s not a real thing.

I look at so many of the mentors who are making millions of dollars. We’re talking seven and eight-figure coaches, and I have seen behind the scenes friends, and there is some shit going down. Now this doesn’t mean you have to be all like, “I’m a hot mess all of the time. I’m just talking about being real and valuing what you learn from your mistakes because that’s how you grow.”

And I don’t want to just put that into words of like, “oh, you grow from your mistakes. I’m never going to show you any of my mistakes.” No, you’re going to see my mistakes. I’m going to share them with you. I’m going to share with you what I’ve learned from them, and not just through rose-colored glasses. 100% own like I did in last week’s episode, where I 100% owned, and apologize for things I have said and done in the past that were replicating patriarchal and oppressive structures. I’m going to own that stuff, man.

I want to work with somebody who’s going to grow in their knowledge and listen, if you’re like, “you know what, Amy is changing a lot of what she says, and I don’t like it.” Perfect. I’m not your coach and it’s okay.

Okay. Where are we? Do we even know what number we’re on? Am I just making this up as we go along? I think so.

If someone else thinks differently then they probably know better than you. They probably have more experience. They’re probably more learned. They’ve probably been around the block a few more times, so you should for sure shut your ideas down before someone else finds out.

If someone else has a different opinion, you should let their opinion trump yours and not stand on your own two feet and say, “Mm-hmm, that’s the way people will be attracted to you and not everyone else out there.”I mean, guys, in what world does that even work?

I know that we are terrified to say, “I don’t agree with that,” but we need to be able to say, “here’s something that I see a lot that’s happening,” and you don’t have to be an asshole about it. You don’t have to, like, “I’m naming names. Here’s the list of things.”

But you can say, “I see a lot of this message happening out there,” and you can even say like, you know, “I don’t even agree with it at all, or I can understand why that’s a common message. I don’t agree, here’s why.”

Here’s what I experienced. I just had this conversation with a client today where she is just so sure that she has to get her clients to a decision on a consult call, and she’s beating herself up so much because she thinks she’s doing something wrong.

And I just challenge the thought, well, what if you don’t have to get to them to a decision that goes against very prominent voices out there, “make sure you get them to a yes or no.” I learned from multiple mentors. “Get them to a yes or no on the call.” Well, maybe, maybe not.

What if you didn’t have to? If you didn’t have to, how differently would you show up on that call? She immediately changed her affect. And all of that, because I was willing to say, “it’s possible that this very strong opinion that’s out there, “it’s possible you don’t have to think that. It’s possible you can have your own idea.” Do not shut your ideas down just because other people think differently than you.

Alright. I think we finally figured out the format of this podcast. I’m going to come in arguing the other side only to finish arguing the right side, it took me a hot minute to get there. Okay?

For sure, for sure. The energy you spend trying to control what other people think of you is always energy well spent.

For sure you should not put all of your energy into solving your client’s problems or finding out what you really think about things or coming up with your next best marketing strategy or showing up inyour coach’s coaching calls, showing up in Path to 100k every week or Free to Paid Coach every week and raising your hand and getting your mind coached.

For sure you should put all of that energy that you would be doing that into attempting to control other people’s opinions. Yeah, because that makes sense, or not at all. Think about the amount of energy. It’s really funny. It’s like trying to control because you can’t ever actually control, even if you try, even if you make that a goal of yours.

I want everybody here to agree with me or at least not disagree with me and you put so much energy into making sure everybody who’s watching you on a Facebook Live are on your Instagram stories. That they’re all copacetic with you and they’re all in agreeance with you.

All of that energy, even if you attempted, you could never get every single person to agree with you, to like you, to think what you’re doing is okay, because everybody has a different opinion. So how can you say 10 different things to 10 different people?

When you try to make everybody happy, you make no one happy, and the most important person that you don’t make happy is you. So, it’s possible the worst energy you could spend is trying to control what other people think of you, because then as soon as you took all of that energy back, you have all that energy to solve the problems of people who already think you’re freaking amazing.

I think we’re on number 6. Listen, if you aren’t there yet, you’d better figure out why and you better figure out fast because detours and failures are a waste of time and money.

Here’s the funny thing, some of your brains said, “actually that’s true. I don’t want to waste time and money and detours and failing and not getting there as soon as possible. That is a waste.”

Some of you actually believe that one. I know because I coach on that one all of the time, particularly at my mastermind level, and it happens every single time. I start seeing people slow down in results and then it’s like they put the breaks on in their business because they start thinking, “I don’t have time to learn and to fail.” Things were going okay, and then a couple things didn’t go okay, and then the brakes. It’s like, it’s like an a out of control train. And that big lever, as you’ve seen in movies … they pull the big brake lever and the train screeches to a halt.

This is what you’re doing every single time you think I’m not there yet and this is a problem. I don’t have time for failing. I don’t have time for detours. I don’t have time to figure this out. I need to know the answer and I need to know it now. It’s a waste of time and money.

No, what I want to tell you is a waste of time and money, is an indulging in that you thinking that getting there faster by just knowing what the right answer is all of the time.

You can never have a successful business. Not long term. Nope. It’s a huge waste of your time and money to try to get there as fast as humanly possible. With zero learning, zero failing, you will never achieve the amount of success you were capable of if you weren’t willing to fail every damn day. Every day.

Not detouring, not growing, not learning, not failing, that’s a waste of your time and money because you aren’t learning anything, and one thing goes wrong in your business in the future, you got nothing to lean back on, and talk about a waste of time and money. That’s when it’ll become a waste.

Alright. That right there is a whole podcast episode. I could have kept on talking.

I think we’re at number 7. I wish I knew when I started out 10 years ago. For sure believing you can create something other than what you’ve already created, like believing beyond what you see right in front of you, that’s for sure. Delusional and like no one likes delusional. Don’t ever be delusional. Always be 100% sure.

Always be able to back up with evidence that exists in triplicate right now, what you’re capable of. Never believe you’re capable beyond what you’ve already created. Yep, for sure.

Or maybe, maybe that’s not at all how the human brain works in any way, shape, or form.

I mean, think about this … think about this from the time we are the youngest baby and we’re trying to crawl. Imagine if a baby never tried to get up on all fours and put one hand and knee in front of another hand and knee, or you know how crawling works because they’d never done it before. Think about a baby or a toddler learning how to, like the word toddler literally comes from toddle, which is stumbling all around while they figure out how to walk.

Can you imagine like a baby stands up and falls down and says, “ah, well I fell, I guess I can’t possibly believe I can ever walk, because I’ve never done it before.” You’ve literally never done anything before until you’ve done it. And yet the amount of coaching that I do, again, these are prominent things that come up in the mastermind level, “I can’t believe I’m a six-figure coach when I’m still only making $2,000.”

And when people ask about my business and I’m like, “hey, you know, I have a successful coaching business, but I haven’t had a consult in six weeks … I’m delusional if I tell ’em that things are going really, really well, I’m delusional if I’m telling business is good.”

And I’m like, “you have to prove you’re worth all of the time. It’s so patriarchal in nature and it’s so oppressive in nature. How are you supposed to have a grand vision and not be a little delusional? If delusional is seeing something that doesn’t yet exist, be delusional. How else are you going to achieve a grand vision of something you’ve never created before? You have to see it. You have to visualize it. You have to feel it in your bones.

You have to believe it in your bones, that it’s absolutely happening, so that you’re willing to try a hundred different things and you’re willing to fall on your face and you’re willing to grow and learn. Remember the episode from a couple weeks ago of having a business worth failing for?

For sure you need to believe beyond what you can see in front of your nose, beyond what you can see on your calendar and in your bank account.

Okay, and the last thing that I have learned in my 10 years of coaching that I had wish I knew when I started that I wish I knew before I grew to a 100k is that you should for sure change your offer as many times as possible because for sure, that’s the problem.

For sure it’s 12 weeks versus 18 weeks … it’s $3,000 versus $2,500. For sure it’s your niche. For sure it’s, you have no idea what your process is. For sure it’s like you gotta throw the whole thing out and start all over again all of the time. In fact, you should probably make one offer to every individual person you talk to and you should ask them, what do you think you wanna do? Two calls? Great, let’s do two calls. That’ll be $50, please.

I mean, you can do it that way, but boy, that sure is exhausting. It’s really funny. I was just coaching a, a client today, believing again, this is kind of number 7 with number 8, believing that the process that you have now is a really good process, knowing that the more people you take through it, the more you’re going to learn, and you might change it.

The same thing goes with your offer. You might find that as you’re going through, people need more than 12 weeks. You might find maybe they need 4 months, maybe they need six months, that in 12 weeks you’re taking, taking 5 or 10 people through a program and you’re realizing, you know what, this isn’t long enough.

Or you know what? I am marketing something to a group of people that doesn’t have this kind of money, and maybe let’s get some people in the door. Maybe I should lower our price. But this all comes with evaluation. This isn’t changing willy-nilly week to week. This is what you learn in Path to 100k of how to evaluate what you’re doing.

What is the feedback that you’re getting? You have to be willing to put yourself out there. You have to be willing to do things that may not be the way you’re going to do them forever because you’re going to learn and you’re going to grow.

And this is what I really love about Path to 100k is, you really are learning it’s not just what’s working, what’s not working?

What’s working with this person that’s here in front of me? What am I seeing in my clients? Are most of them needing more time? Are most of them leaning, needing less time?

Am I seeing that I am marketing a program to a low-income niche, and I’m attempting to sell them a high-ticket package. That comes through evaluation, that comes through coaching. Let’s take a look at it. Let’s test it out. Let’s see what happens, and let’s evaluate it from a scientific method point of view, not from a, “I’m going to this person, I’m going to offer this and this person, and I’m going to offer to this and this person.”

You can’t possibly test; you can’t possibly know what’s working when you’re offer changes every 3 days when it’s a different offer, every single phone call, we can’t know what’s going to work and what’s not going to work. You’ll never know what the best length a program is, what the best price is, tour positioning, the results that you can really promise people, the results that you can really sell. You’re never going to know that if you’re constantly changing it.

And these are all tools that you learn in Path to 100k is how to come up with that offer as well as how to test it over and over and over again by talking to your people in a way that is different from how everybody else is talking. One of my favorite questions that you answer in Path to 100k is, let’s say you are a weight loss coach in a row of 10 weight loss coaches all selling the same method. The same method, the same everything.

Why should they choose you in a row of 10 business coaches? Why should you choose me? You need to know the answer to that. If you don’t know the answer to that question, guess what? They don’t know the answer to that question, and they won’t hire you over somebody else because they don’t know the answer.

But if you know the answer to that question, if you know what makes you distinctive, what makes you different, changes everything, and then you can go talk about it in a way that might have people have opinions about you, in a way that might be a different opinion than someone else. In a way that you might have to say a few different ways before you figure out how to say it in a way that makes sense and connects with your people.

Okay, so 10 years of coaching. Take credit for the success you have. Do not copy what everybody else is doing.

Figure out what you need to do. Put everything out there. There’s no such thing as perfect. You do not need to wait until something’s perfect before you put it out into the world. Stand on your own ideas.

Be willing to be different and controversial. Do not spend energy thinking about what other people think of you. That’s wasted energy.

Taking epic actions, and failing and learning is the best use of your time and money because that’s where you’re going to grow and that’s where you’re going to learn.

We need to always be believing that you can create beyond what you’ve already created. That is the magic sauce, and you need to be so in love with your offer.

Get rolling around in the mud and naked with your offer so that you are not willing to cheat on it anymore. Those 10 nuggets right there will change everything for your business.

It’s for sure what I wish I knew 10 years ago and also I love the business that I have created. 10 years, my friend.

I love my 10 years of business. It doesn’t look like everybody else’s 10 years. I’ve coached hundreds of people. I’ve impacted thousands of lives. I’ve made well over a million dollars, but I’m also entering this 11th year, in my 10^th year, 2022. I made half of what I made in 2021. And I’m proud of that.

I’m stronger, I’m happier, I worked with a hell of a lot more clients last year than I did the year before. I changed my coaching models. I changed my business models. I purposefully canceled two launches so that I could rest and reevaluate based on some personal things that happened in my business and in my personal life.

And I owe no one anything except for me in serving my current clients to the highest level and to the best of my ability. This is what true competent coaches look like. As I’m not striving for those awards, I don’t need somebody else’s platform in order to feel and believe that what I got going on here is a really groovy and amazing thing, and I’m inviting everybody along.

What would that look like for you to stand on your two feet and truly believe, I got something that can help people. These problems that they have, I have solutions for them. I know I can help them achieve new goals and feel better about their life, have less overwhelm. I know I can, here are the reasons why I know, and I’m going to go tell them about it, and I’m going to share it with them in a way that tells them, this is why you hire me and not someone else.

And let your people find you. I can’t find you if you’re wearing the same thing everybody else is wearing. That’s the most important thing to know. After my 10 years of coaching. It’s taken me a long time, my friends, and hey, if it takes you just as long, that’s okay too. But hopefully it doesn’t have to.

You’re going to be with me these next 10 years. Let’s do it. How fun is that? Where are we going to be in 2033? Holy crap. What? Where are we going to be in 2033.

Here’s one last thing I want to leave with you. No matter where you are in your business today, I want you to think back on the day you very first started.

For me, that’s 10 years ago when I got that distributor kit in the mail and I shared it on social media and I said, “hashtag new beginnings.” I got the picture to prove it, from January 3rd, 2013. I have that picture. I’m getting verklempt guys. I can feel it. I have that picture.

Amy, on that day, what? She can’t believe what we’ve created in 10 years. I’m not where I thought I was going to be for the past couple of years when I’ve been in certain rooms that were like, the only room, that’s the only place you should be is seven, eight figures. This is where we’re going. I sure thought I would be there by now because everybody around me was like, well, that’s what we’re supposed to do, supposed to do, supposed to do.

If I look at where I haven’t quite made it to yet, alll I feel is “it’s not good enough,” tut when I think back to Amy, January 3rd, 2013, “hashtag new beginnings” with her distributor kit, she’s blown away. Look how far I’ve come, how much more powerful I am. How many of my friends have said, you are not the same person you used to be? You show up so differently in the world.

A couple of my friends, “you’re a lot more opinionated on things.” Those are mostly my friends who have different political views than me, but they’re like, “you’re a little bit more opinionated than you used to be, but you know, we kind of like this new version of you no matter where you are.”

You can focus on where you think you should be right now, but I invite you to revisit where you were the very first day, or the day before you started. Look at how far you’ve come. Build your evidence from there.

That’s the gain energy. That’s the holy crap, look how far we have come, look at what all we have created, we have stated, we have worked with, we have made, even if you’ve made $5 as a life coach.

Even if you’ve just told people, I am a life coach, you are farther ahead now than when you started. Go back to that person, see what she thinks and tell you right now. Amy, on January 3rd, 2013, she’s like, “who are you? You’re an entirely different animal. I think I want to hang out with you.”

Alright, my friends. This is the work my friends. We are currently enrolling for Path to100k Mastermind right now. www.amylatta.com/mastermind.This is what’s possible. This is the coaching that we do together.

We figure out what lights you on fire. We figure out what sets you apart. We figure out what your controversial takes are. We figure out why you aren’t sharing them. We figure out why you’re beating the shit outta yourself because you’re not farther along.

We coach through all that stuff. You cannot put a price tag on knowing how to find what lights you on fire, what’s really working for you, what you are exceptionally good at, and replicating the hell out of that.

What you are not great at, what you hate doing, what you need to outsource, what you don’t need to do that everybody else has told you to do and eliminating that and then taking massively epic actions over and over again where you’re willing to build that failure muscle, because failure is the only way you’re going to achieve the success that I know that you’re capable of.

Those are the three steps you repeat over and over again and Path to 100k Mastermind. Those 3 steps will take you anywhere you want to go. Learn them now. Use them forever. You come in with us.

Alright, my friends. www.Amylatta.com/mastermind. I’ll be excited to see your application come in. I can’t wait to talk to you on the phone, and I’m so excited to see what you create in the world. Talk to you next week.

Coach, it’s time to sign your first free client, your first paid client, your next client, and to learn how to do it consistently and having a hell of a lot of fun along the way. This is exactly what you’re going to do in Free to Paid Coach. It’s the only program giving you step-by-step what to do to become a paid coach and step-by-step how to handle the roller coaster emotions that come with doing what you need to do to become a paid coach.

If you know you can’t not do this life coaching thing, but believing that you can do it, handling rejection and remembering how to do all of those things shuts you down, the Free to Paid Coach Community is waiting for you. Find everything that you’re looking for inside. It’s only $1,000. Payments are available, and then you’re in forever.

Visit www.amylatta.com/ftpc to join us right now. See you inside. Let’s get paid, coach.

Thanks so much for listening to The Confident Coaches Podcast. I invite you to learn more. Come visit me at amylatta.com and until next week, let’s go do epic stuff.