You are listening to episode 19 of The Confident Coaches Podcast, the one where we learn to grow our confidence accounts.
Welcome to The Confident Coaches Podcast, a place for creating the self-confidence you need to do your best work as a life coach. If you want to bring more boldness, more resilience, and more joy to your work, this is the place for you. I’m your host, Amy Latta. Let’s dive in.
Hey hey my confident coaches. I’m so excited to have you here today. So full disclosure. As you are listening to this, I’m pretty sure I’m sitting on a beach, which means when I wrote and recorded this, I was thinking about being on a beach.
Listen, there’s a lot going on in the world right now and I’m just saying that the ocean cures many ills, which is why the family and I are totally relaxing on a beach in south Florida, assuming that all goes well between now and boarding that plane this weekend.
Because listen guys, we all need a break and we all need to get away and we need to remember that in the grand scheme of things, we are mere pebbles on the sands of earth, or whatever. There’s a metaphor in there somewhere. I think I might have blown it, but you get my drift. There’s a lot going on.
And so I highly recommend to you to find a way to go reclaim some mental health this week. Maybe it’s in this podcast. I don’t know. But if anything, get outside, reconnect with nature, take a walk, listen to the birds. If you’re lucky enough to be in south Florida like the Latta family, go step out onto the beach and stare at the waves. That’s what I am doing.
So anyway, my friends, today, in today’s podcast, I am super excited to introduce another brand-new concept and tool to you today. We’re going to be talking about confidence kind of like we talk about banking. Now wait, don’t go running away. And also, I know banking right now could be a touchy subject for some people.
But I am no banker. I am not a banking aficionado. But this is a concept that I’ve had bouncing around in my head for literally years. And it just recently came full circle. And I promise, it has made a huge difference for me, and it will for you too. But first, just a quick reminder of how you all can help me celebrate my birthday that’s coming up.
I am looking for 18 more reviews for The Confident Coaches Podcast by April 10th. Could that be you? Will you please let it be you if you haven’t already? That would be 18 reviews total by my 46th birthday. So have you left a review a yet? I promise you, it just takes a few minutes.
So if you are listening right now, please leave a review on Apple Podcasts, won’t you? You subscribe, you rate, and you review right there on your Apple Podcasts app and yes, if you are an Android listener, you can do this right on your computer. You do not need the app on your phone.
And I will share with you in my birthday joy and we will celebrate on April 10th with 100 reviews in the basket, right? And you might even get your review read in a future episode. So help me celebrate my birthday my friends if you have not yet left a review yet. I am asking for one thing and one thing only for my birthday.
And speaking of having reviews read in future episodes, let’s do that right now, shall we? I want to give a shout-out to Confident Coaches listener CherryCola75. So whoever you are, CherryCola75 on iTunes, let me know who you are if you’re hearing this and I will update your shout-out on my Insta stories.
Anyway, CherryCola wrote, “I recently found this podcast not too long ago and love it. As someone who is just starting out as a new coach, I definitely resonate with Amy and just learning to be confident. Confidence is something I struggle with and her tips have been super helpful with my journey. If you need help becoming confident or just facing fears about anything, the podcast episodes will empower and encourage you, and I highly recommend to give it a listen. It is filled with humor and also provides strategy around your thoughts, and taking the right actions will lead to the results you desire to have.”
Miss CherryCola, thank you so much for that. And yes, understanding that becoming more confident is something that we’re talking about today in a way that we haven’t quite talked about it before, I’m super excited to share this with you. Let’s talk about confidence accounts.
This is an idea, again, that’s been swirling in my head for quite a few years before I got my own coaching around confidence. It came to fruition a couple of episodes ago when I was talking about having a 20-minute anxiety attack while climbing Camelback Mountain in Phoenix. Now, I talked about this event and the mental gymnastics of fear just two episodes ago in episode 16.
There was a moment in the podcast where I talk about when I finally ended this back and forth of fear in my brain and I literally physically turn and put one hand in front of me. I was at the top of a steep ridge and while everyone else was walking across it, I moved across that steep ridge on hands and feet one forward motion after another.
I fully experienced the fear that I was experiencing while also reassuring myself I was safe and put one hand in front of the other, and then again and I did it again until I was across the ridge. And with each movement forward, I could feel the confidence increase in my body. I could feel the physical sensations of feeling more confident with each forward motion.
I also want to point out, I did not take one motion and then stop and wait another 20 minutes and then take another forward motion. If I had done that, I would have lost that confidence gain from that previous step. It would have been like I would have gotten up the courage to take that first step and felt confident but then it kind of would have not gone anywhere if I would have sat and waited.
It really was the movement after movement. And as I was sharing the story over and over the following week with each of my clients and how to take at least one forward motion in their coaching business every single day, I started using this analogy of a confidence bank account.
So it took me a couple of days to kind of wrap my head around this but then it really just came full circle, and it’s what I’m sharing with you now. So imagine this, that with each forward movement, with each step forward, a tiny bit more confidence comes up. You feel just a little bit more confidence. And you get to bank that. It can’t be taken away by anyone.
And then with each forward motion after the other, at least one a day, at least one after the other, after the other, that account starts to accrue interest. The confidence actually builds on the confidence. That’s what I was experiencing as I was moving across that ridge. The difference between taking one movement forward and then waiting, and then taking another movement forward and then waiting, versus one after another, after another, again and again and again.
I’m gaining confidence each time, I’m banking confidence each time, I’m putting a confidence deposit in each time, but it builds faster and it compounds interest when I do it one after the other, as opposed to waiting between each step. Picking up what I’m throwing down here?
The amount you have grows faster the more often you’re depositing into it. I remember in my 20s I’d see these graphs about investing money. I was a young corporate executive, huge multinational public relationships firm and there are all of these things talking about investing your money. And they were all so clear. When you start investing in your 20s, you would accumulate millions more than investing the same amount but starting in your 40s.
Now unfortunately I didn’t take that advice back in my 20s, and I’ve thought about the amount of money I could have accrued by now if I would have started investing in my 20s, but that’s a separate story and separate lesson for another time and definitely another podcast. But the same banking theory is at work here with this confidence.
That when you decide to take actions every day, and specifically I’m talking about making an offer every day in some way, it becomes so much less about the result of that one offer. It becomes so much less about the deposit in your bank account at the end of the day, the balance.
It becomes so much more about the accrued interest of confidence you earn when you make an offer every day, that you have more confidence making offers not just in the individual deposits, but by the compounding growth that comes from doing it each day.
You feel more confident at making offers faster, just like your bank account balance would be higher faster, by making a deposit into your confidence account every day, instead of just once every once in a while. And so far, I have just been talking about your confidence account of making offers, but imagine this, that you do have other confidence accounts.
Because you have a confidence bank with multiple confidence accounts. So really imagine this. So in my real life, my husband and I have a bank account and then within there, we have multiple accounts. We have a couple savings accounts, we have a checking account, we have the business checking account, I have a mutual fund account.
Now, I have built the entire Confident Coaches program and the five steps to creating self-confidence in believing that you can build each of your confidence accounts separately and on their own. We want to create self-confidence that we can do the one thing through purposeful belief, through having our own back, through evaluation, through all of those five steps, absolutely.
But the fact is right now, you do already have some hefty confidence accounts. Maybe in other areas of your life, but you do have confidence in your life. You might even have confidence in other areas of your life coaching business.
So as a for instance, maybe you feel very confident writing posts, writing emails, but you don’t feel very confident going live on Facebook. Or maybe you feel very confident in coaching clients once you have them, but you don’t have a lot of confidence in actually offering the consultation call with which you can sell them on coaching.
And again, I am a firm believer in creating self-confidence and your ability to do the thing that your brain tells you you can’t do, but don’t think for a second that I haven’t borrowed confidence from one of my other accounts before.
So for instance, I have zero doubt in my ability to parent. My parenting confidence account, sky high. It’s high interest, high yield, it’s the shining star in my confidence bank. For sure, without a doubt, people could – and I want to be honest with you – people have told me to my face that they think I’m making a mistake in how I’m raising my kids and how this just does not affect me.
I don’t doubt for a second that I’m a great parent and making decisions is something my husband and I are really great at as far as what we think is best for our kids. When people openly tell us, “We don’t think this is a good idea, we don’t understand this,” our confidence account is so high in the area of parenting that even in the face of backlash or in the face of contradictory information or in the face of criticism, it just doesn’t affect us. Doesn’t bother us at all.
But that is not always the case when it comes to making decisions for my business. So making decisions for the family, making decisions in parenting, got it. Making decisions for my business, this is a confidence account that I’ve been building for the past couple of years.
My confidence account as a business owner making decisions does not have as high of a balance as a confidence account as a parent. So I absolutely work those five steps to creating self-confidence in my belief that I am an excellent business owner who makes good decisions for her business. I am absolutely going to work on that purposeful belief and that feeling of discomfort.
Future Amy, I really mentor a lot with her when it comes to making decisions and having my own back when I make a decision that doesn’t work out so great and evaluating every decision I make. I’m absolutely working those five steps to creating self-confidence.
But I have also at times when the disbelief is stronger when the belief, I’ve moved a little confidence over from my parenting account into my business owner account. So in real life, my husband and I have a few accounts with our bank. Our bank is USAA, and as I said, we’ve got a couple of different accounts already going.
And we have designations for each of those accounts that I mentioned. And we absolutely work on them separately, putting specific deposits into their respective accounts, but there have been times when we’ve had to move some money over from another account.
Maybe we’re taking a big trip and we need a little extra boost from another account. Or maybe something unexpected came up, like maybe something we’ve never faced before or an influx of unexpected bills. That’s happened sometimes too. So we’ve needed to move some money over from another account.
It’s not a matter of habit. We don’t rely on it all of the time to borrow from one account to another, but just knowing that it’s there. I’m absolutely working on my self-confidence as a business owner of my own life coaching business, but there have been decisions that were bigger than maybe the norm, or decisions that were unexpected, and I have moved some confidence over from other accounts in my life that remind me, hey, I do know things.
I do know that I’m a person who can make decisions with confidence. I do know I can speak with confidence. How do I know that? Oh yeah, that’s right, in this area over here in my parenting, I don’t doubt that. So if I don’t doubt that over here, it’s possible I can not doubt that over here. So I’m going to go borrow a little confidence from that parenting account, not all the time. I don’t dip into it often, but I know it’s there if I need it.
And I do this with ease in all of these other areas of my life, and all of these separate confidence accounts, they’re all housed in one bank, right? That’s me. The bank of Amy. There I go. I’m the bank of Amy and I have different confidence accounts within me, and some are super high and some aren’t so high. And I am absolutely not wanting to deplete one or borrow a ton of one and put it into the other. I want to continually add new deposits, but knowing that those other accounts are there.
Huge for me. This has been a huge change for me right there. Life-changing right here. If I have confidence in my abilities in one area, just remembering that confidence exists changes everything.
So think about your confidence accounts. The confidence accounts in the bank of you. Replace you with your name. The confidence accounts of fill-in-the-blank with your name. Some of your accounts are golden. You have worked on them in the past, they are earning so much interest at this point, you don’t even need to add more to the deposits. You could practically retire on them.
Other accounts are brand new or relatively new, or they are accounts that you have struggled to grow. Those are the accounts to work on. So here’s how we’re going to do that. Here’s how you work on your accounts.
So first off, let’s identify the good ones. So alright, in the bank of you, go ahead and write that at the top of your page. The bank of you. Replace you with your name. Mine is the bank of Amy. Identify your confidence accounts that you could retire on.
These are the areas of your life you feel super confident in. And you know you feel super confident in them because if someone told you you were bad at it, you would totally not believe them. And on a scale of one to 10, with one being the lowest confidence and 10 being the highest confidence, what are your nine and 10s?
So parenting, marriage, maybe working for other people, career, health and fitness, recreation, spirituality, personal health, personal relationships, hobbies, personal development, self-care, these different areas that make up who you are. Rate them on a scale of one to 10. What are your nines and your 10s?
Those are the areas of your life that you have a high confidence account in. And if someone were to try to tell you you weren’t that great at it, you’d be like no, I got this in the bag, you’re just clearly wrong. So now identify your confidence accounts within your life coaching business.
Think about actions you do take or want to be taking in your coaching business. And now rate them on a scale of one to 10 on how confident you are. So for instance, how confident are you at writing emails and social media posts? Speaking in front of others, going to networking events, doing Facebook lives, making offers, signing clients, coaching clients, planning your time, making decisions.
If you have any other areas you want to include, by all means, these are not exhaustive lists that I’m giving you here on the podcast. They’re just some of the areas that I came up with right now, I’m just talking to you. And now rate each of those on a scale of one to 10 as to how confident you feel doing that thing.
Once you have your one to 10 ratings on these actions you want to be taking, you now have a reference point at which accounts are struggling in confidence. Which ones need some deposits? Which ones could use some compound interest, right? Which ones are doing maybe a little bit better?
And understanding this, that your confidence accounts in those areas, they only grow through taking the next step in front of you. They only grow through action. So similar to the offer a day challenge I gave you in last week’s podcast episode, commit to taking actions in your different confidence accounts each day by remembering, what do you need to think in order to believe that you can do that thing? How would that feel in your body?
And then go take those actions. Even if that means experiencing some discomfort for a little bit, know that each movement forward, each action you take, one after the other, is not only going to make a deposit into your confidence account in that area, but the more often you do it and the more you do it, overall, you’re going to compound that interest.
Beware of your brain’s desire to spend more time in the confidence accounts that are already strong. There’s nothing wrong with checking and remembering that those balances are there, but your other accounts aren’t going to grow without the forward action in that account.
So if doing Facebook Lives is a low account and writing emails is a high account, that means more time spent doing Facebook Lives than writing emails. And only you know which accounts need to grow and which ones don’t, so that’s why you want to use that on a scale of one to 10 method.
Just be willing to be honest with yourself and remember that with each forward action, with each step forward, that confidence gets deposited and it will grow that compound interest. And when you have something big that you want to do and you have something unexpected, when you need that little extra boost of confidence, you have those other areas of life that are already at nines and 10s that you can go reference and go, oh yeah, that’s right, I am a confident person, I do know things, I am a smart person.
I do know how to do things, I do know how to make decisions, I do know how to go out there and be who I want to be. Borrow that little bit out of another account and then go take some action. Alright my friends? Okay, so this week we are growing our confidence accounts. Only you know which ones need the most work. Only you know which ones need the most love. Only you know which ones need the most deposits.
Be willing to be honest with yourself as to which ones those are. Be willing to not spend a lot of time where you already have a high account. Be willing to spend more time in those accounts that are a little on the low side and start making deposits and watch all of your confidence accounts grow. Watch all of that interest compounding. And until next week my friends. I cannot wait to see how you use this work in your life this week.
Friends, I am so excited to offer you a podcast-only treat. I am sharing with you the five-day Unblock Your Confidence mini course. It is only available to The Confident Coaches Podcast listeners and the only way to get your hands on it is right here. Why do you need this course?
Well, in this five-day mini course, you will learn why it seems like you struggle with confidence when others don’t, how to build trust in yourself, how to get over your fear of failure, how to stop caring so damn much what other people think, and the best thing you can do to unblock your confidence today.
All of that in just five days. This is some of my best work waiting for you. Visit www.amylatta.com/unblockconfidence to get yours. Again, that’s www.amylatta.com/unblockconfidence. Go now and get started today.
Thanks so much for listening to The Confident Coaches Podcast. I invite you to learn more. Come visit me at www.amylatta.com and until next week, let’s go do epic stuff.