Ep #179: Priming to Buy – Are you Influencing or Manipulating Your Audience

You’re listening to episode 179 of The Confident Coaches Podcast. The one where you’re gonna stop treating your audience like a bag of crap. All right let’s go.

Welcome to The Confident Coaches Podcast, a place for creating the self-confidence you need to do your best work as a life coach. If you want to bring more boldness, more resilience, and more joy to your work, this is the place for you. I’m Amy Latta, let’s dive in.

Hello coaches. I’m so excited about this episode today. I’m going to need you to grab your notebooks because we’ve got another episode in the Shady Business Shit series. And also, I’m sure you can probably tell it’s allergy season. I do have a little bit of a froggy voice. So, if you don’t mind my sexy voice, it’s either that or not record. So, let’s just go ahead and do it. I have done a couple of episodes over the past couple of months of pointing out some business practices that I have seen.

I’ve seen and always had a problem with that I’ve seen and replicated myself or just that I’ve now become more aware of, that maybe I wasn’t previously familiar with, that are falling into what I would call shady business shit. And what do I mean by shady business shit? I mean business tactics, sales tactics, marketing tactics that you use, that online business uses to sell coaching. That is not in my opinion and in an opinion of a growing voice in the industry is not elevating the industry is not elevating the industry to a higher standard. The bottom line is life coaching is an unregulated industry. It really is the wild, wild west out here.

You really can do and sell whatever it is that you want to do. You can totally do people. There’s not a ton of repercussions for it. And also, just because you can doesn’t mean you should. I’ve done a great interview with you. I’ve had a couple of really great interviews. I’ve done a previous Shady Business shit episode before this one. I want to focus specifically on the art of priming. Do you know what I mean by priming?

When you’re priming the pump, when you’re priming your audience, you are getting them ready. You are building them up to get ready to buy. It’s like priming the pump. You’re literally like pumping, pumping, pumping before the water starts coming out. It’s the lead up to. So, when you’re talking about priming your audience, it’s about getting them ready to buy. And I want to be really clear, priming in and of itself is not a bad thing.

That is what marketing is. Let’s be really clear. And this is why a lot of people have a lot of ick factor around marketing and selling. Marketing is all about influencing your audience. It’s all about a persuasion, right? It’s all about priming them to buy. You’re sharing content, you’re running ads, you’re sharing materials beforehand. You’re sharing testimonials. All of advertisement is this way. All you have to do is just sit down.

If you haven’t watched network TV in a while, do you know they still run commercials? All you have to do is watch commercials and watch how they are priming you, how they are influencing you, how they are persuading you to purchase their product. Coaching is not immune to that, right? We are always working to influence people, to choose to work with us over someone else, to choose coaching as the solution and to choose us as the deliverer of that solution.

But there’s a lot of ways we can do it. Like there’s a whole spectrum of ways that we can influence people. Story sharing is influence to have them experience thoughts and feelings that lead them to the conclusion that you want. Giving them coaching ahead of time so that they can see what’s possible, letting them. In other words, this could be the prosperous coach method where you’re just having long conversations, letting people experience your presence so that you are priming. That is priming.

Like, this is what it’s like to spend time with me. These are the kinds of conversations we’re going to be having. These are the kind of problems we’re going to work through. That’s just as much priming as it is. Some of the tactics that I’m going to share with you today that I would call much less influence and much more manipulation. So, when does influence become manipulation? And that is part of this conversation. Okay, so the conversation we’re going to have today, I just want to kind of give a preemptive.

You may not agree with everything I share here, okay? You may not. You might hear some of the things that I share today and be like, I’m actually okay with that one. I actually don’t think that that’s a problem and that is okay. This is not me saying, hey, here’s what is not okay. And you should all agree with me. These conversations, these episodes I’ve been dropping, they are all about starting the conversation.

Some of what I’m going to share with you today is stuff that people pointed out to me years ago that I was like, I don’t think this is a problem. And now I have since been like, okay, I want to err on the side of elevating the industry and using as little manipulation as I possibly can. This is also not a call out episode. This is not a naming names. I’m just going to be sharing some things that I have seen either. Firsthand, if I am calling anyone out, there are some coaches who reached out to me to share some of their own stories, and they’ve given me permission to share some of those things with you.

I want to be really clear. Influencing versus manipulation. I will 100% coach my clients. A very common thing that I coach my clients to do is okay, so what’s in their thinking model where their action is not scheduling a consult call with you, what might they be feeling that leads to that action? What might they be thinking that leads to that feeling? And how can we address those thoughts and feelings?

We can’t control what the people actually think and feel, but we are working to influence it, right? We are thinking, okay, they aren’t buying that’s the action I want them to take, or they aren’t scheduling a consult call with me, and that’s the action I want them to take. I wonder what they might be thinking, feeling. Let me speak to those things. Let them know that I understand that and let me show them how I would coach them through that.

And then they still have full autonomy. They still have full autonomy to decide if they still want to work with you. So, the things that I’m going to talk about here, when I’m talking about manipulation, I want to offer to you that these are things that I’m seeing that I believe is removing autonomy. It’s removing agency and sovereignty, that these people are in full control of their choices because we do know that their scared lizard brain, their helga brain is going to try to override.

So, this is why this is a scale, right? This is a sliding scale because the scared part of you is going to be trying to make this decision, and we want the thinking part of them to make the decision. But a lot of times what’s happening in these online business tactics is we’re trying to get their thinking completely out of the picture, and we’re trying to get to them to buy on pure emotion, pure group think.

I’m going to offer to you that a lot of what I’m going to share with you is pulled right out of cult tactics. A lot of the stuff that cults use too. None of these people are running cults. I want to be really clear to you, I have not met anybody in life coaching that is running a cult, okay? However, there are some tactics that cults use that are transferring to online business, and they are emotions based.

We’re not thinking based at all, right? We don’t want them deciding from their helda thinking. We want them deciding from their gigi thinking. But these things throw all of that out the window and they want you deciding from pure emotion. Okay? So, let’s get into what some of these tactics are. So, one of them I know, a male online person. This is a very common kind of four step pattern that I see happening in a lot of larger sales events, webinars, live events that sell from the stage master classes, this kind of thing. So, here’s the pattern. Here’s the pattern I want you to look for.

And this was shared with me by a follower of mine who gets my emails. And when we were first conversing, we were talking about sharing this, but when I went to go to broadcast for this, I hadn’t heard back from her if it was okay if I used her name or not. So, I’m going to go ahead and omit her name. But I do know that this is a pattern that she pointed out to me, and I have since noticed it. She shared this with me last fall, so I have since noticed it. So, here’s, kind of like the four-part pattern, is you start with something flashy to train the brain or to train people to act fast, right?

So, this is where they’re going to offer up here’s, a VIP Day. That’s usually $10,000. You can get it for just $10. Or here’s this free. Or here’s this purse for $10. It’s normally $10,000 and give it to the first person who can run up on stage and ask for it. The whole point is don’t think, act. Be bold. Do not put too much thought into this because you might miss out. So, this is do you notice, they’re priming.

They’re priming the audience. Act fast, something flashy. You are priming people to impulse by, to buy from emotion, not thought. And then we get into step two, which is the hyping. And I have seen this. Oh, my gosh. I’ve sat in on a lot of webinars and I see this over and over again. Lots of group chanting. I’m extraordinary. This would be me running a webinar for free to paid coach, having everybody chanting, I’m a paid coach. I’m a paid coach, right?

I’m a confident coach. I’m a powerful coach. I’m extraordinary. Again, it can be really powerful, particularly if there’s a large group of people and this can be done online. Like, you’ll see the chat box on the side and everybody’s typing it in and everybody’s typing in, and you want to be a part of that, right? This is also this is hype. This is group think. This is right out of the Colt Tactic Handbook right here.

So first we’ve trained them to act fast. Now we’re getting them all hyped up and getting into that kind of group. I don’t want to be left out of this group. Then we’re going to bring a panel of your top success stories. We’re going to parade all the top people across the stage or in slides or whatever the presentation model is, and have them share their A to B story, their rag to riches journey, their their fat to thin journey, whatever it might be. Right.

Notice, though, is that we’re going to share these stories, but there’s not going to be any conversation around how it might have helped people achieve something entirely different. Or maybe they didn’t quite achieve the goal, but they still grew. We’re certainly not hearing from the vast majority of customers who never achieved those results. In the episode that I did with Mark Butler a couple of months back, we talked about the graveyard of coaches left behind, right?

So, if you have, let’s say, an organization that has 1000 clients and here are five to ten people that are their success stories, that five to ten people seems really, really powerful, but there’s 990 others out there who haven’t yet achieved that yet. One of the things that I’ve always strived to do is put people on my podcast who haven’t necessarily hit the monetary goal, the flashy goal, or the fat to thin goal, or the rag to riches story, but a story that still had power.

A story of like, I didn’t quite get this result, but here’s how I changed and how I shifted that every story, every success story. And I’ve been in a room where my story wasn’t flashy enough, that there were flashier stories, and it was kind of like, I’m really damn proud of what I’ve achieved, but apparently, it’s not powerful enough, right? So be aware of only the top. Are you only hearing from the 1% of their clients and then following up with an irresistible no brainer financial offer?

Like, if this is a 10k offer, listen, you’re only going to put $500 down now and then we won’t have any payments for a couple of months, and then you’re only going to pay $700 a month for the rest of the year. Like, it’s so easy, right? Or they’re going to do like a buy now before I double the price and I’m going to throw in this fabulous extra that’s worth so much money. So, you see this kind of like four-part process that kind of happens, right? They prime you to act fast, they hype everyone up, they show only the top de la creme of success stories and then give you that irresistible offer that you just can’t say no to.

But you better do it now because if you don’t do it now, this offer is going to go away. And then sometimes you’ll also see a fifth step of offer. Some sort of small group, like a group call. Do you need a group call to talk to anyone who’s thinking about joining, about investing in themselves, where frequently the vibe might be, are you playing to win or are you playing not to lose? Right? Are you thinking high enough, you don’t want to give up on your dream? This is where that kind of idea of if you were committed enough, if you had a hard enough, why, if you believed in yourself enough, you’re just not believing hard enough.

I’ve heard this language and it’s very and of course; this is coming after the priming and the grit and all of the hype and the success stories. Does it work? Yeah, it works really, really well. And also, so what I just shared with you right there, that’s just like one of the things I’m sharing with you today. It’s a multi step, one though, but really notice some people might just use one of those things, but that’s an actual script. I want to be really clear. This is a process that’s actually being taught, follow these five steps.

And what it’s leading to is people buying out of pure emotion and not really because this is the best thing that’s actually for them. They want to be a part of it. And it’s a very psychologically, manipulative way. And notice through all of that, with the exception of those top success stories, we’re not really talking about the true benefit of what they’re going to experience. It’s all about the hype of it.

So, a variation that I’ve kind of seen, some other things that I’ve kind of seen thrown in in this that might be mixed into this process is I know that there’s one online salesperson. I sat in on a webinar that this person was hosting and there was this kind of like he was going really fast and there was like, are you guys keeping up with me? Are you guys keeping up with me? I don’t know. That’s exactly what he was saying, but that’s what my brain was interpreting of this kind of like, hey guys, stay with me here. Keep up with me here.

There’s this vibe of like, you gotta keep up because I’m smarter than you. I’ve got smarts that you don’t, and you need to work with me. It’s almost like a form of nagging. It’s not like outright nagging, but there is kind of like a condescension or I can see what you can’t see, and you got to keep up with me here, right? That kind of vibe. A little manslaney. It’s like, it’s like a little mansplainy, a little naggy, but there’s definitely like a, hey, you got to keep up with me here because this is where we’re going and are you keeping up with me?

That one really rubs me. I can spot that a mile away and I’m like, OOH, I don’t like it. This doesn’t feel good. Like, you’re you’re kind of given the vibe of like, silly person who can’t keep up. Come on. A different, like another variation that I’ve seen on this and sometimes, like, this is its own thing. Sometimes it’s mixed in with those five steps as a form of accountability to you. So, you’re sitting in a webinar or you’re in a live event, or maybe you even paid like a small amount for this class.

But the whole purpose of this either free or paid event is to get you to buy the larger thing, right? As a form of accountability to you. They have you go post on social media in the middle of the event, in the middle of it. I’m in this thing right now and sharing with people how you’re already like something you’ve already learned. Or there’s another example that I had before I started recording. I don’t remember what it is. I’m actually thinking of something years ago. I saw years ago, before I ever found actual when I was life coaching, but I hadn’t become certified yet.

And we were in this big, large room. It was mostly real estate agents. There was a handful of us life coaches in there, and they had us like, we were all on Facebook asking people, go ask people what their favorite restaurant is. And the whole point of it was to increase engagement on your page and to get conversations started. And when there was this way of kind of like, sharing, like, oh, I’m at this big event right now and people are asking me.

So, it’s manipulative to the audience that’s on social media of like, you’re not genuinely coming to share things and to start conversations. It’s like a trick to get them to engage with you. And also, really, they’ve got you hawking their wares and working with them before you’re even all in, right? Like, I’m in this class right now and I’m learning this amazing thing and I want to share this with you. And the sharing of it is some form of accountability, but you’re sharing that you’re in that class right there, and there’s this kind of like, wait a minute, you aren’t even 100% bought in.

And this salesperson or this coach has you talking about the class that you’re in or the program that you haven’t even maybe fully bought into yet, and there’s this kind of form of accountability of it to you. It’s presented as accountability, but really, it’s just having you sell more shit for them when you aren’t even all in yet. And this is separate than sharing testimonials. We could do a whole podcast just on using testimonials and screenshots out of Facebook and things from coaching sessions.

We could do a whole terms of use conversation. I have drastically changed since I’ve started this podcast, probably even since a year ago. I have drastically changed how I approach the use of testimonials. This is a little bit different. Like, you are not even necessarily 100% bought in on them and they have you talking about the class or the live event or whatever that you’re in to help create more buzz about them.

Okay, next thing, guys, I haven’t even gotten through the list yet. A lot of what I just shared with you in that kind of like four to five step process plus a couple of these little offshoots, they’re all about creating. This is technically a separate kind of priming thing that I see, which is kind of creating artificial demand. Now, there’s a little bit in what I’ve already shared, but sometimes this is its own thing of like, everyone’s doing it but you. You always want to talk about, like, everybody is already buying it, but you it’s really leaning into your fear of missing out as opposed to selling you on the real benefit of it. Right?

But you’re always talking to the massive demand of all of these people when there may not necessarily be all of those people, but you’re only speaking as if so, many people want this. You’re never talking about anything other than this is selling like hotcakes, whether it actually is or not. Now, again, this is that manipulation because it’s leaning on your FOMO. There is a little bit of that that I mentioned in the first other steps, right, of, like, the group think and the group chant.

There’s a lot of leaning into your FOMO here, but this can be its own separate thing here. So, anything where you’re really leaning on people’s FOMO realize that that is a manipulation. You are wanting them to buy because they don’t want to feel left out. That’s a terrible reason for somebody to buy into your coaching program. All right, so another potentially manipulative thing that I see a lot of, I’m just going to call it the Ladies of Duped, maggie Peterson and I’m so sorry, Maggie’s co host partners. Melissa, Michelle, I totally blanked on her name.

They talk a lot about magical thinking. So, this is just that kind of like manifestation talk, high vibe talk. Where this can become really manipulative is in that you must not be thinking high enough if you’re not investing. Okay. We could do a whole conversation just on whether or not manifestation is really a great thing to be selling or high vibe is really a great thing to be selling. Okay. I do believe in the power of positive thinking. I do believe in the power of really, we can create so much from our mind, but talk to some people who aren’t quite in that privilege set and they’ll have some thoughts and feelings around manifestation and high vibe talk. And we’re going to talk a little bit more about that in just a couple of minutes. But the real manipulation that I see with the magical thinking kind of marketing is if you’re not buying into the manifestation and the high vibe and all of that, then we go back to that conversation around are you playing to win?

Your why just must not be vibe enough. Your thinking is not high enough. If you thought cleaner, then this manifestation and this high vibe would work for you. And it’s just gross. This is icky right to tell somebody that the only reason that they’re not buying from you or that they’re not getting results in your program is because they’re just not thinking high enough. It’s like, maybe I’m not being coached well enough, or maybe this program isn’t a good fit for me, or maybe you haven’t sold me on the real value of why I should work with you. Now this next one, you might take issue with it, but I’m going to throw this in here manipulative. I don’t necessarily think the thing itself is manipulative, but I think how it is used can sometimes be. And this is the pay in full big money investment. And frequently it looks like this.

I just paid 25 or $50,000 to work for a coach because I’m committed, and I paid in full, because paying in full tells my brain that I’m committed, and this is who I want to work with. The manipulation part of this is the insinuation that people aren’t committed because they don’t have ten. They don’t have five or ten or 25 or $50,000 sitting in their bank account or have that line of credit or have a relative who could lend that to them. And this idea of commitment means pay in full.

Guys. I totally used to do this because it was modeled to me. It’s like, oh, if I’m paying in full, I’m more committed. And yes, there can be more admin work when you do payments. And yes, there certainly are clients. I’ve certainly had clients who have taken something and made, like, lots of tiny little payments and created so much extra work. That can be true. And also, you can have super highly committed people who simply just can’t put their hands on five figures of cash.

And it can be very manipulative when you’re like but if you are really committed, you would pay in full. You would do this; you would figure out that way. Again, it becomes a manipulation when we’re preying on that person’s emotion to buy as opposed to their thinking. All right. Caitlin on Instagram wanted to share what she calls the fake comparison pricing tactic, which I thought was really fascinating. I totally hadn’t thought about this before I started recording this episode or before I started doing notes on this episode. And this is the one where you go to buy a course or something like that.

And it looks like the price is hugely discounted, and all of these bonuses are included because they are worth so much money. Like, that valued at they wouldn’t actually sell all of that stuff at that dollar amount at this highly valued. It’s very infomercialist. As soon as Caitlin shared this with me, I was like, oh, my gosh. This is like one of those infomercials on late night TV where it was like, but wait, there’s more, right?

But wait, there’s more. And again, does this stuff work? I’m not saying that it doesn’t. There’s a reason why QVC is so popular. There’s a reason why late-night infomercials work because they’re preying on people’s emotion. They don’t actually need the widget, but when you double the order and you throw in three extra gifts and you throw in these five different cookbooks, the next thing you know, I think I need the set it and forget it rotisserie cooker.

Why are we doing that with coaching? But we’re totally doing that with courses and classes with coaching. You are not a late-night infomercial, and you’re preying on people’s. Like, I think maybe I need something that I don’t really need, but I’m getting all this extra stuff for free. It’s included. Oh, my gosh, I love this example because, again, it’s not really selling the coaching on its merits, and it really is feeding on people’s. Like, but I’m getting such a value, right? I’m getting all of this stuff that’s valued at all of this high dollar amount and I’m getting for this tiny, tiny bit.

I don’t think I’ve ever done this. I’ve certainly packed a lot of value into my programs, but I don’t like individually to price them out, being like, here’s a $30,000 offer that you’re getting for only 59 99. Right. I believe my coaching is worth that much, but that’s not the selling tool that I’m using. Okay. And then I have I got a lot of points from a good friend of mine, Nicole. She sent me a couple of things.

A couple of the things that she sees is when we are really using a lot of aspirational goals that aren’t really possible, anybody who’s been in business for a long time or anybody who’s been in the marketplace for a long time selling those things, any of those. I did an episode a few weeks ago, like what we can learn from traditional, the people who’ve been doing this for a really long time, anybody who’s been doing this for a really long time knows, like a brand-new coach making 30K in 30 days.

What? Or 250K in 250 days or these are really aspirational. These are your top panel things. So what Nicole was talking about is really those top, that panel of only your most absolute, most successful people. If one person has done it, you decide all people can do it. Because if one person can do it, all people can do it. Well, I mean, maybe, but for most people, that goal is going to take much longer.

And I do believe it is manipulating people when you say like, you’re going to get to 30K in 30 days or you’re going to lose £30 in 30 days because you had one person do it, when really, they need to sign up for multiple rounds. And I’m going to be really clear here, and I have Caroline’s permission to share this. I have a client from a year ago. I sold a path to 100K. Here’s what you can expect. Here’s what we’re going to do. And then at our live event, I shared how actually here’s what you can expect.

The first round, the second round and the third round. And it’s probably going to take four rounds. And it was one of the first things that I shared, and she was very put off by that. Here’s the thing. This was something that I did because it was modeled to me and I was coached into a place of like, yeah, that’s a good that you are setting them up for renewing. And I’m like, but we didn’t sell them on. That we sold them that they could be on. Like, this is what they can achieve in one round. And now we are getting in and we’re like, oh, you’re going to need to be here for two, three years in order to actually achieve that.

That is manipulative, and it is something that I’ve taken out of my program. So not only did Nicole bring it up through a couple of different examples, but this is also where I’m sure and I reached out to Caroline this week. Is it okay if I tell you, if I talk about this on the podcast, that when we, like we want to make sure that people understand what they can really expect and that the sales isn’t one person did this one time, so I’m going to sell you that. You can do it.

Here’s what so and so did. Here’s what so and so did. Here’s what so and so did. Let’s find out. What’s possible for you is a much better tactic than you’re going to make 30K in 30 days. And then they get inside and you’re like, oh, actually, that’s going to take that’s probably going to take a year or two. One thing that Nicole shared with me, I think this is the last example. And then we’re going to kind of like, what’s the alternative, right?

I didn’t know about this. I didn’t know that this was a tactic that was actually being taught to prime the pump for renewals. So, all of this has kind of been priming the pump to prime you to buy that’s in a more manipulative way. This one is priming the pump for renewals. And it’s the school of thought that a coach and a program. So, this is usually more of like a group program kind of thing. Maybe you might see this in one-on-one coaching where when they first start out, there’s a lot of contact. There’s this whole five-star experience in the beginning, and then the coach actually kind of pulls back for a little bit whether that group program or maybe if it’s one on one, they’re not as available in between sessions or something along the lines of that.

And then a week or two before the renewal, the coach comes back with that glorious five-star experience leading up to the sales. This is being taught as a thing to do on purpose. To me, I got to tell you, I got like, bad boyfriend vibes from that. Would you share that with me? I’m even stunned now sharing it with you. I was like, that’s really a thing that people are taught to do. What priming the pump for renewals? Like an intentional, like, love bombing you in the beginning, kind of pulling back in the middle only to love to bomb you right before it’s time to renew again.

I mean, that is some gas lighting bullshit. Don’t like it, don’t do it. I’m not even going to put that in the gray area of like, you know, really, you should think about that one. No, you should not be thinking about that one. That’s terrible. Don’t do that. Here’s the thing. So, I just shared a bunch of examples. There could be tons more out there. I might have dumped some examples on you that you’re kind of like, oh, what?

Or oh shit, I’m doing that. Or you know what, I’m doing that. And I don’t really think it’s much of a problem. Listen, these things don’t not work right. I’ve watched coaches have massively successful launches using these tactics. They are like on all the podcasts. They’ve got books. They are stars in the industry. I’ve seen firsthand people, you may be one of them, I was for quite some time, who feel good in their decisions to override your audience’s thinking prefrontal cortex and who do show up very differently in their actions because they have put so much money on the line. This doesn’t not work for you as far as selling and this may not necessarily it worked for me as the client.

I not only bought into some of these tactics, but I was able to create amazing results until I wasn’t anymore, until I was growing in this direction over here. Until I saw and I didn’t even implement all that I was taught until I saw that people in my audience were raising their hand. I had lots of people raising their hand over the past few years ago. I don’t like that you did this. And I’d be like, well, my coach does it and her coach does it, and this coach does it, and that coach does it. So, I can’t be wrong.

So just because there are people who are doing this, and just because there are people making a lot of money doing this, and just because there might be clients who are in those programs going, I feel like I got a good deal, doesn’t mean that there aren’t people who are very alienated. Doesn’t mean we didn’t still manipulate them from buying through emotion. And I got to tell you, when you get to that place of like, you just aren’t thinking high enough. You’re giving up on your dreams. I’ve had that said to me and I’m like, bullshit, that’s not the problem here.

And here’s the thing. We’re coaches selling coaches. We are coaches selling help and elevating people. There should be no manipulation going on here just because it works. And also, I want to be really clear, most people who are doing this are delivering, but some people don’t. There are some people who do kind of disappear. Maybe they’re doing that the whole like love bombing renewal tactic thing. EW.

Most of the people using these tactics, they’re not scammers. They are delivering a legitimate product. But it’s just a product that may not work for everyone who bought because the people who bought, bought from a place of FOMO of emotion, fear of like, I’m the only one who’s not going to do this. This is my only opportunity. This person’s smarter than me, and that’s not what we want to be doing. This is a problem.

Why is this a problem? These success stories tend, and to be really clear, a lot of the people who are successful in these programs that are sold in this manipulative way already have a lot of privilege in their favor that they can still succeed in that environment, okay? Because these manipulative ways don’t allow for people. Like, there are people who are just going to be left behind or they’re going to people who are going to buy, and they just don’t have the support that they need.

And it’s not just coaching that they need, but they don’t have the foundational support they need in their life to be able to succeed in that. So, I’ve talked about this before. Like, me, I was married, and I have children, and I do have Add and those restraints on my time and energy. But also, I had a husband who could cover all of my bills. I inherited a chunk of money that allowed me to invest at a high level at the first time.

I’m a white American woman. I speak relatively non accented English. People assume I’m Christian. While I may have a whole host of autoimmune stuff, none of it prevents me from working so I can be a success story in somebody else’s program. Like that, right? They cater to people who already have a leg up or two. What about the other coaches? What about the other clients who don’t have that? Are we really going to tell them, oh, it must just be your thoughts.

Why aren’t you believing hard enough in your why? And let’s talk about clients who do buy by being manipulated in their emotions. Do we want clients who are deciding based on FOMO and cult like tactics? Do we want clients in our program who the only reason are there is because they were afraid of being left behind. Not because they’re actually ready to do the work. Not because that they actually had the money to do the work. Not that because they have all of these things that our best, most like, our ideal, most perfect, best clients should have.

Are they really all in on you and the process if you’ve sold them Hype, if you’re selling the Hype, if you are selling the act now, don’t think do they really even understand what they bought? Are they all in on you as a person from learning from you and in your materials? Are they really all in on your process? Because here’s what I want to offer to you, which the alternative is, is being real, being you.

Storytelling of your program, storytelling of what’s possible when people are in your program is actually the better way to say that where the story tells them what is possible when they work with you and that you aren’t racing to get there. You aren’t racing to be further along than you are. You are telling these stories and you’re allowing people to come to you and you’re letting them know now is the time you can prime people.

I’m working on a really great program that’s going to do this and this. It’s dropping soon. If you want to get on my waitlist, I’ll be the first one that will tell you, here’s all the ways it’s going to change your life. Here’s all of the Tuesday at 01:00 P.m. Problems it’s going to solve for you. You can post polls and those sliders on Instagram asking where their interest is, set timers for when it’s about to drop. I mean, these are ways you can prime and get people excited.

But the thing that they’re excited about is actually what you’re selling and all of the possibilities of what you’re selling. Tell them all of the things and how it’s amazing. Quit keeping it like a whole secret and all of that. Tell them how it’s going to work for them. Tell them all of the possible outcomes that are possible for them. Listen, when you join free to paid coach, yeah, we’re going to get you paid.

Some people get paid right away. Some people, it takes them a couple of months to get there or even longer. But every single person who signs up and does the work comes through on the other side, knowing that they can handle what they weren’t previously able to handle, thinking higher and better about themselves than they ever have before. And that is worth everything. And that is what will get you to becoming a paid coach.

Now I could only share the stories of the people who made their money back in the first month. Or I could share all the stories and all the stories of what all the variations of what success looks like. Sell them. That right. You wouldn’t need all of those manipulations if you weren’t in a race to hit an external validation goal and you were really able to communicate all the amazing ways that coaching with you is going to change their life.

And listen, if you use any of those methods, I’m not shaming you. I have used those variations. I have used FOMO for sure, 100%. I have used the hey, here’s what you can expect when you work with me. And then once they’re inside the door, hey, that’s going to take, you’re going to plan on reinvesting a couple of rounds. I was priming them for renewal right in the gate. Now that I see it, now I do see it. Like I used some of those things.

A lot of the rest of the things, they never really felt right to me. Maybe I didn’t know why. Maybe now I do. I’m just offering to you that if you are in a race, and you are truly here to elevate yourself and your audience in the industry. You don’t have to rely on manipulating people’s emotions to buy. You can prime them through excitement and story and all of the things that are possible for them.

You don’t have to prime them through manipulating their emotions. One last thing that Caroline wanted to add when I was talking to her. This is a direct quote. My bullshit detector goes off unless someone doesn’t promise the moon. Her bullshit detector, her manipulation detector is always on. And it’s only when they’re not promising the moon is she like, oh, okay, so there we go. Is somebody promising the moon? Are they using a lot of what my grandma would call rasmatabs to sell it?

Are they giving a pumped-up environment to sell you more? Have your bullshit detector on. Just be aware of when you’re doing it or when you’re seeing it. Maybe it’s more when you’re feeling it. Okay. All right, my friends, there was a lot packed into this episode, so if you need to relisten again, absolutely. Each one of those things could probably have its own podcast. There’s lots of ways we will continue this conversation.

So, I just want you to be aware of where you are doing this in your own coaching business and what the alternative is. And also watch how you are being sold to and are you seeing this also? And listen, it’s time to become a paid, profitable coach by playing more so you can sell more. I do want us to have a lot of fun, but we can do that without manipulating people’s emotions. If you want to get paid, that’s free to paid coach, my friends, it’s for coaches who want to become paid and get to ten k.

Do you want to be profitable? That’s path to 100K. That’s for coaches who’ve made ten k and they want to run a profitable coaching business that elevates their life right now. Do you prefer one on one coaching, either business coaching or that deep dive coaching through a feminist lens? Just connect with me and let’s just see if I have a spot open right now. Or we’ll get you on a waitlist. I can’t wait to hear what you have to say about this.

Please hit me up in the DMs or on socials or however you prefer to contact me and share what you heard today that you really needed to hear. I can’t wait to hear from you. I love all the interaction we’ve been having lately, and I’m so excited to see what you’re going to create in the world. All right, talk to you next week.

Coach, it’s time to sign your first free client, your first paid client, your next client, and to learn how to do it consistently and having a hell of a lot of fun along the way. This is exactly what you’re going to do in Free to Paid Coach. It’s the only program giving you step-by-step what to do to become a paid coach and step-by-step how to handle the roller coaster emotions that come with doing what you need to do to become a paid coach.

If you know you can’t not do this life coaching thing, but believing that you can do it, handling rejection and remembering how to do all of those things shuts you down, the Free to Paid Coach Community is waiting for you. Find everything that you’re looking for inside. It’s only $1,000. Payments are available, and then you’re in forever.

Visit www.amylatta.com/ftpc to join us right now. See you inside. Let’s get paid, coach.

Thanks so much for listening to The Confident Coaches Podcast. I invite you to learn more. Come visit me at amylatta.com and until next week, let’s go do epic stuff.